Tired of those frustating errors, always destroying your important work? Who do you turn to when your PC is broken, mangled, or covered in parmesan cheese? And what IS that smell, anyway?
Your PC maker can't help you. The people who made your software are now out of business. And does Microsoft love you? No. No they don't. We saw a greater need to the community, nay, the planet, and thus formed Moogle Tech Support, your one-stop site for help with all of life's troubling technology! Hardware, Software, Wetware, Evening Wear, Rareware, we handle them all!
But don't just take my word for it, check out these real conversations our helpful staff have had with our members!
|Moogle Tech Support, my system keeps telling me my RAM is corrupt, and I don't know what to do!|
|Have you tried putting it in a small box?|
|What, you mean the PC case?|
|That'll do. Have you run a RAM allocation scan utility to make sure the memory can properly interface with the motherboard?|
|Er, give me a sec... Nope, it didn't work.|
|Then there is one more thing we can try...|
|Oh wow, hey, that worked! That's incredible, how?|
|It is the power of Positive, young jivehopper. Now make me a sub.|
|But I'm not even-|
|I SAID MAKE IT!|
||Hello, Moogle Tech Support, "the finest in-" blablabla.|
|Er, yeah, hi. Lately my hard drive has been acting up-|
|What, your warez not functioning as they should, you little pirate?|
|What? I don't pirate software!|
|Yeah, sure, whatever. Anyway, you tried turning the PC on?|
|...Yes, of course, how else could I know it's having problems?|
|Guess I'm stumped, then. Thank you from Moogle Tech Support and have a good day.|
|Hello, is this Moogle Tech Support?|
|Hi, I was wondering about my laptop, lately when I-|
|...Uhmn, yes. Anyway, when I try to boot it, at first it's OK, but...|
|Pikaben hurts me at night.|
I know, our breadth of our knowledge is staggering, isn't it? I bet you can't wait to get rid of all those pesky problems that have been keeping you from the PC activities you value most! To contact Moogle Tech Support, just dial 1-800-555-KUPO, that's 1-800-555-Kay-Yew-Pee-Oh. And if you're pure of heart, you'll be connected with an operator immediately. Thank you, and we hope you enjoy care-free PC operation from Moogle Tech Support!
Moogle Tech SupportTM is not held responsible for any loss, damage, or injury that may occur while following operator-given advice. Moogle Tech Support is not a licensed PC repair service, and has been banned from Idaho, Tennessee, and Tenniru. If Moogle Tech Support is swallowed, please seek medical attention immediately. Do not taunt Moogle Tech Support. Offer not valid where Colin Mochrie lives.